In Darkness

Oh, to fall softly 
into satin-shrouded darkness 
beyond light's grasp

Oh, to be subsumed 
into smoky caliginosity
of tenebrous depths

Oh, to escape into
night's inky embrace
unfathomed by day

Oh, to live in
obfuscous splendour
untouched by luminosity

Oh, to be a Cimmerian
plunged into ecstasy
in an obsidian land


© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Through A Mother's Eyes

You're getting old, ma, you say          
the sting of careless words
softened by a smile    
You laugh at the grey littering my hair
the crow's feet by my eyes                  
with all the arrogance of youth

You need to get a life, you tell me,
when I hover around you 
I want to say, I did have a life
-- before you --
that looked a lot like yours now  
I fretted about school,
cried over boys,
wished I looked pretty,
had fun with friends
Everything was great or horrible
no in-betweens                                
I lived my life,
like you, in extremes

But now, it seems
like another lifetime
Now my world
revolves around you
I beg, I cajole,
I soothe, I scold,
I shout, I nag,
I worry, I love
like I've never done before

Perhaps I do need to get a life    
But I've been a mother so long   
I've forgotten
how to be anything else
It will take a while
for me to remember
how to be something more


© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Slow Burn

Incandescent, I glow 
when you turn me on 

I burn at your command 

You wait till I turn red hot 
Then, with a cruel flick 
of heartless fingers, 

you vanish 

leaving me 
the impossible task 
of turning myself off


© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Descent into Depression

Razor sharp teeth

rip apart 

the slumbering dawn

rudely awakening 

a reluctant day

Loneliness

a beast unsatiated

Ever seeking

to stamp its emptiness

on life

Draining the colour

from everything it touches

taking the shine away from the sun

the sparkle from the stars

the glow of the moon

Tipping solitude over the edge

into depression's black hole

where no emotions exist

turning energy into apathy

A soul set adrift in nothingness

barely able to remember

memories of shared times

the comfort of reaching out

for a hand to hold

the balm of a shoulder

to rest a weary head

the magic of eyes meeting

in a roomful of faces

Now there are only

infinite vacant moments

adding up to a unwanted lifetime

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Perfect Darkness

Nowhere to hide our flaws
in the harsh glare of day

Frustrated frown lines
scar your forehead
Spidery exhausted wrinkles 
mar my face

But in the gentle glow of night 
all imperfections vanish
If we meet in the dark 
we can pretend we are perfect

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Words

You kiss the words on my lips 
waiting to be said 
You hold them in your mouth 
roll your tongue around them 
tasting their sweetness 

Infused with your honeyed breath 
your erotic scent 
you pour them back into me 

They taste different 
burgeoning with secrets 
known only to us 
I savour the love they hold 
the passion filling their essence
I let them slide down into my heart

Rich with promise, magical words
that do not now need to be said
swell and fill our souls

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Seasons of despair

Tears I should have
shed for you percolated
into my soul, a
shell of salt encasing 

my ravaged heart, rendering
the fertile soil barren
No feelings take root 
in parched, sterile land

Echoes of faded memories
etched on shrivelled chambers
Where once love flourished
now an arid landscape

No hope of rejuvenation
no fresh emotions bloom
Winds of neglect breed
endless seasons of despair

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Drowning

Drop by drop 
each unshed tear collects within 
A deep pool reflecting sorrows
accumulated day after day

Always a period of calm 
the well of emotions unruffled 
preceding the storm 
waiting to be unleashed

It breaks and builds 
whipping up the still waters 
into a whirlpool of despair

Impending devastation 
threatens to overwhelm 
One day, I know, 
I will drown in myself

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Communication Breakdown

Your silence a magnet
I, the polar opposite,
inexorably drawn to it

How nice to be with someone 
not in love with the sound of his voice
Too many of those glib talkers
go from clever to tiresome
never having learned to listen

What attracts, can also repel
As the years passed
I grew to hate your silence
I had to speak for both of us
Perhaps I fell in love 
with the sound of my voice
for I chattered on
never noticing 
that you stopped listening

The magic of gadgets
pulled you further away
I marvel at the machines 
and their fancy names --
iPhone and iPod and iPad 
All the "i"s leave no room for us

Was there ever an "us", I wonder
Long before the gadgets
we had already stopped talking

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

Valentine's Day

A day to celebrate love
yet I dread it
I can’t remember
when I last felt
my heart race
like a steed 
galloping 
at full tilt
at the thought 
of meeting someone 
I couldn’t live without

The hands on the clock 
crawl like a snail
But I’m not in a hurry 
to get anywhere
Nobody waits for me 
with a bunch of red roses
or a box of chocolates 
with a big red bow

Like a snake
I want to slither 
into my hole 
hide from the world 
until the day 
dissolves into dark 
and there is 
flaunting of love
for another year


© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved

How The Cookie Crumbles

I feel my heart 

crumble inside me 

A cookie pulverised 

within its wrapping 

I don’t dare 

to unwind the skin 

that holds it together 

lest the bits 

scatter at my feet

Then I think 

why not let them fall 

Better they are 

ground to dust 

under my feet
than feel
the piercing pain 

of your heavy tread

crushing them 

into oblivion

Then again

is it not better 

to be obliterated

than continue to exist

cradling the remains

of what used to be

a heart full of love

© 2014 Uma Venkatraman ~ All Rights Reserved